By Paco McCullough
THE STABILIZER is a bad movie. Sure, at times it’s a fun bad movie, but overall I found the experience of watching it unpleasant. What plot there is involves a FBI agent, Peter Goldson (the stabilizer), traveling to Indonesia to track down the evil Greg Rainmaker. Rainmaker killed Goldson’s girlfriend with his spiked shoes, which has led to Goldson following him around the world. Rainmaker has been making a new strain of drug that he’s attempting to sell to the Indonesian population. There’s also a subplot involving a drug detection device and a bunch of other ridiculous stuff.
THE STABILIZER plays like most bad 80s action movies: it’s overlong with unnecessary levels of exposition and poorly choreographed action sequences. Nothing about the movie is particularly remarkable aside from characters eating live reptiles at least twice throughout the movie. It is such a bland movie that as a stand alone crapsterpiece, I could not, in good faith, give it a good score.
However, I saw this at Portland, OR’s, Hollywood Theater. While the movie played, we all played B-Movie Bingo. These cards and the fun atmosphere the environment provides improved what would have been an otherwise boring experience. I don’t know if the group that runs it, Wolf Choir, is a national group. If it is and they come to your area (or if you live in Portland), I urge you to check it out. It’s a great experience, and you can walk away with a prize or two. If you are thinking about watching THE STABILIZER elsewhere though, think again. It’s a piece of trash and a complete waste of your time.
Critical Score: .5 out of 5
Crapsterpiece Score: 2 out of 5
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